Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Intimate String

Intimate String           

A few years ago I met with some special women in my inner circle and discussed the possibility of starting a not for profit organization for women. The concept of this organization was to uplift, inspire and empower women socially, economically and politically (especially women of color). In a previous post I mentioned a “wise friend”, she was present at that meeting.  When we began to discuss the topic of the relationship between mothers and their children (in her infinite wisdom) she stated “there is such an intimate string between mothers and their children”. We were intrigued. She went on to say that after a child is born the connection much like the umbilical cord is not severed. The bond between mother and child is so strong that at times mothers don’t realize they cripple their children when they don’t require or allow them to become or expand their own self-sufficiency.  Recently I reflected on this very point with regards to my own children.  Of course being the mother of four totally different individuals, I had to recognize how my role as mom played into their growth, knowledge, understanding of self and value.  I had to check to see whether or not I was corrupting my “intimate string” by not being a ‘nagging Mom” (which is something I am definitely not J)  or enforcing my own dreams on them because it had some connection to who I was in years gone by or even if I was lovin’ them up too much (if that’s possible). I had to revisit my childhood and understand what things at different stages of my life I was seeking and how I could ensure that my own children had no lack in those particular areas. After my historic trip down memory lane, I realized that I had to be a blabber mouth.  I had to talk about things that were taboo both to my sons and daughters. I had to impress upon them morals of kindness, sensitivity and compassion.  I had to stress the importance of valuing who you are and being a blessing to people.

As mothers it is our role to uplift, inspire and empower ourselves and the intimate string between us and our children.  God gives us the wisdom to know (the "mother-wit") even though raising them does not come with an instruction manual. It’s a challenge to ensure that we are making the right decisions but when we see that our children have their own “Aha moments” about things we have shared we recognize that it was all worth it.

High-five your children today…let them know you recognize them in all their cute, sometimes obnoxious and loving ways. Then give yourself a high five (It’s not silly, I do it all the time J) to recognize yourself for being an awesome Mom, auntie, grandma, cousin (Just high-five yourself for being you!).
Lovin’ you is easy,


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